a pianissimo life

Binge, Purge

2009-10-14T22:42:00.002-04:00

Hello again...

I returned home this week from my lovely, relaxing vacation. I should add the adjective 'indulgent' as well. And now... now I'm exhausted. Returning to work should be gradual!

Seriously, as tired as I am at the moment, I need to initiate another post to kick-start this endeavor once more, even though I don't have much to share in great detail while in this state of sleepiness.

However, hear you me. I have been seriously considering my consumption habits and am prepared to make that next step of DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT. I have been chewing on some ideas of how to go about the mess I've made for myself so that I can begin to make better choices when future opportunities to over-do life occur.

Don't get me wrong, I want my life to be rich, full, delicious. But this will rightly be achieved by taking the cue of Psalm 119:103: How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! (ESV)

So, tomorrow I am going to address my three-prong approach to simplification. For now, goodnight!

In the details

2009-09-29T21:17:00.002-04:00

Good evening!

One of the last things I mentioned in the previous post was that I was not prepared to start reducing my belongings just yet...and that I thought this was a good thing.

It's certainly advantageous to have a little more time away from my belongings to prayerfully consider the method in which I will simplify. That's precisely what I will be doing. I am leaving tomorrow morning for a conference for the next few days. When I return, it will only be to leave again for my week-long vacation. Fortunately, my vacation will be a truly relaxing one with plenty of time to, among other things, think. I will also continue to post my thoughts, although perhaps not daily.

In the meantime, I have been reviewing others' methods for simplifying their current collection. I decided to focus on this act of reduction first because I believe managing what is already in one's possession will lay groundwork and set the pace for the rest of this lifestyle shift. I don't believe that owning things is wrong or bad. In my case, my current possessions drive me to distraction. They facilitate my ignorance of issues truly worthy of my time and capacity.

In the resources I found online, I can sum up others' reduction efforts in two categories. Some have a predetermined number of items they will get rid of in a given amount of time. For example, the 10 Things Challenge endeavors to reduce things, ten at a time, and find a new home for them that maximizes their use, whether it be donated, recycled, gifted, etc. The other approach is based on the idea that if you haven't used something for a certain length of time, you won't miss it. Bliss Tree addresses this idea, also taking into consideration the clutter of outdated material or outgrown clothes that are still around.

Regardless of the purpose behind reducing, both strategies have their merit and reinforce the fact that we all likely possess things that we don't need, don't use and won't miss. These are actually the easiest things to get rid of. Of course, my personal exercise isn't limited to getting rid of what I won't miss. I am aiming for sacrificial living to better relate to sacrificial giving. But, we must all start somewhere.

An interesting project that I'd like to mention is the Dress Project. I encourage you to read the premise for yourself. I have a friend who is in the process of sewing her dress for the month of October, the very same dress she will wear daily for the entire month. I am excited to see where this project takes her. I'm rooting for you, R!

I think I would still like to post something tomorrow, but I have yet decided what angle I will take. More to come!

Step 1: Put the bag of candy corn down.

2009-09-28T22:37:00.004-04:00

Okay, I have a problem. Too much of my life is devoted to what I can get out of it, keeping me self-centered, stingy and narrow. So what's the plan?

1. Take inventory of my life.

If I just clear my head and reflect on my priorities, one after another the signs tumble down. God has been doing a good work in showing me where my selfishness has taken its toll in the way I think about possessions. Holding on to stuff is really just a symptom of a deeper trust issue.

2. Educate!

I'll take any opportunity I can to talk about and listen to others regarding this issue. Talk to me about it! Let's share some ideas. This portion also includes consulting scripture. Also, I just started reading Will Samson's Enough: Contentment in an Age of Excess. It is a provocative supplement, directly addressing a Christian's response to consumerism within the context of community.

3. Use or lose.

I foresee this step will be the most gradual and emotional. Only by God's grace will I succeed here. The things I have already hoarded will be put to the test. If I'm really not going to use it, it's leaving the house. I will need accountability here. I must set some limits, some criteria. Is there anything that can be truly kept? Are there things that can be kept only until they are used, and then released? How can I be honest with myself? Should I let somebody else assist me in judgment calls? I've already failed at reducing my book collection because, as before mentioned, the box of books is still settled on my bathroom floor.

The duration of this blog will be used to share with you how I'm coming along in these three areas. I certainly welcome encouragement and advice. Clearly, this post is a very brief snapshot of something occurring much more deeply. That's the point. I trust God that I'm going to grow, but I've also limited what I've posted up to the present so that I can carefully, intentionally delve into these areas, affording this growth the proper attention required to truly learn the lesson.

Tomorrow we will start light. I will share some different methods for getting rid of stuff. I'll also share why I'm not spending the next two weeks actually reducing my tangible distractions. You'll understand. The way I see it, this couldn't have come at a more fortuitous time. That's how God rolls.

Stay tuned!

A Purchase-Driven Life

2009-09-27T22:16:00.004-04:00

As promised, I'd like to discuss the dangerous misdirections of amassing stuff. For a long time I never realized I was a stockpiler of unnecessary objects. I always considered myself to be easily amused and grateful for experiences over belongings, which helped blind me to the fact that I really depended on a purchase-driven life for entertainment, general distraction, and fulfillment. Many times I spend my money out of boredom. Spending is ingrained in much of my life. I spend money to curb loneliness. I spend money to lose weight. I spend money to be seen. I spend money to not be stuck at home with myself. I spend money to procrastinate. I spend money to have a supply of things, that I may never run out of toilet paper, yogurt, face wash, reading material.

I spend money to the point of distraction from real issues that matter. I spend money to the point of unavailability when others need aid. I spend money to the point of forgetting that I have long-term plans.

So far, it may seem as though I'm a shopping addict. This isn't really the case. I budget my money rather well. Aside from student loans, I haven't accrued major debt. I am aggressively paying off my loans, for that matter. I only blow my money on "retail therapy" after major break-ups (which, friends, is a whole other issue that must be addressed before the next big break-up. I'm not anticipating one of those any time soon.)

The fundamental problem, however, is that I take and take and take. I justify that I need to survive, I'm spending money I earned, and it's good to always be prepared. At the same time, I claim that I trust God to provide for my needs. Yet, I never put myself in a position to rely on him in any material way. Not to mention, I am too distracted with my consumption to consider His provision on a spiritual or emotional level. I don't have room for God. I don't have time to finish what I've started. I don't manage to long for anything because I want for nothing. I perhaps have even lost understanding of what true longing is.

There are times when I feel alone. i am fairly independent and happily so. I do enjoy taking on projects by myself. I like to spend time alone. Except for sometimes. Sometimes, I do feel alone. I also feel that I have crowded out any chance of developing meaningful relationships with others because I'm so distracted by my consumption. Furthermore, because I don't want for things, I have no need for a person to provide. We are encouraged to be self-sufficient and not leech off of others. I think this makes for fraudulent fellowship. I don't think it's wrong to need others, just as it is not wrong to provide for the needs of others. But much like my lack of need for God, I set myself up to be self-reliant and not allow others to invest in my life in meaningful, relational ways.

I have more stuff than I'll ever need. I own more books than I'll ever have time to finish. More DVD's than I really have the desire to watch. More clothes than I'll ever feel comfortable wearing. More music than I can every truly appreciate. More food than could ever be healthy. More, more, more. More.

It has to end.

Tomorrow I'll share the steps that are being taken.

Consumerism

2009-09-27T00:46:00.002-04:00

For several months I have been mulling over my lifestyle of consumerism. The thought is burdensome and yet not nearly as troubling as my inability to follow through with my conviction.

Simply put, I have too much stuff. All my stuff is a distraction to me and I spend too much time thinking about justification for the purchases I make in my life. A couple of months ago I decided to clean out my book collection, an emotionally difficult process which I have not gotten very far in fulfilling. In fact, all I have accomplished so far is placing certain books I've already read in a box. This box is sitting on my bathroom floor. I can still see the books.

Clearly, this process requires more power than I possess independently. My failure also speaks volumes of how I really feel about God's sufficiency in my life. I'm very successful at seeing myself as a failure, but I was recently reminded that I have already been transformed into a new creation. My failure HAS been redeemed. However, I will only bear the fruit of a renewed life when I seek to fulfill the qualities of a new creation. This will only happen when I depend on God. Otherwise, I will continue to fail in this pursuit.

It is my goal to use this space to track the successes and pitfalls of consuming less. Tomorrow I will go into greater detail about how consumerism threatens truly abundant living, specifically in my life.